While in the waiting room of our doctor’s office, I picked up a magazine and started reading about ways to keep love and sex alive in your marriage.  In this article several couples shared their ways of keeping their love alive in today’s environment.  I kept finding this theme in different magazines.  So I decided to write down ideas of how to keep one’s marriage alive and well in this century.

My husband I have been married for over 46 years.  We have endured our share of bumps along the way.  So how did we survive all of these bumps?  Here are a few ideas on how to keep your marriage alive and well and many of these ideas have been practiced in our home.

•  Always making the spouse feel special.  Showering compliments on her looks and sexual charm is quite rewarding for her.  Especially when she is told how beautiful she looks.
• Receiving flowers and other lovely gifts without any specific reason brings a smile to her face.  These little things make your relationship stronger.  I remember the time I opened my refrigerator to start supper and there was a bouquet of flowers in the center of the refrigerator.  When I turned around to say thanks, there stood my hubby with a big smile on his face. 
• On different occasions, we plan dates.  Yes, at our ages of 68 and 69, we still create dating times.  We were remembering our cruising days:  we went from one end of Marion, Ohio (Stewarts Root Beer Drive-in) to the other end of town (L&K Restaurant).  Our dating days were back in 1961.  So we revived them once again.  Fun.  This week (July 2, 2008) we took my husband’s mother to Stewarts Root Beer Stand for an evening meal.  Mom is 95 years old and she shared how she used to come to this same root beer stand while she was dating.
• By planning your “dates” around a picnic, don’t forget to bring candles.  Yes, lit candles on a picnic table may not seem romantic but it is.  It is something your spouse will not expect but be extremely pleased that you did.  It will bring joy and laughter.
• While walking down the trails, hold hands.  That human touch means so much.
• Taking an evening stroll around your neighborhood, walking along the riverside or strolling down a country road, reach out and take your spouse’s hand.  The rewards are great.
• Regular physical touch is necessary.  On many occasions my husband comes into my office, leans down and gives me a kiss.  This brings a smile to my face.  There are many times when I enter his office, get behind him, reach around with my arms and hug him.
• Try kissing your spouse on the cheek before leaving for the office.  When you return home, greet your spouse with a hug and a kiss.  This takes such little time but warms the heart.
• Take a bath together.  By having lit candles around the bathroom, it gives an ambience of romance.  Try having glasses of wine or soda (if you don’t drink) sitting near the bathtub; give each other a toast; massage each other with aromatic oils.  Pleasure is something we all enjoy.
• Take some time out of your busy schedule (each day) to be with each other.  That quality time you spend together will make your bond stronger. 
• When your children are young, you might not feel that you have the strength after a busy day to be romantic or you may not feel like it.  That is the time, you need that extra hug, a kiss on the cheek, a swirl around the kitchen with no music playing, to climb into the bathtub together, massage your spouse’s feet will help him/her to relax, or simply putting your arm around your spouse and encouraging her to put her head on your shoulder.  These little things mean so much to a mother who is wiped out and bring you so many new rewards.  These little pleasures bring great rewards and are more remembered than you might think.  When you are older, you may remind you of those little things that meant so much to her and most of them will only cost you time.
• Think of the ways you want to be treated by your spouse and treat your spouse even better.  Your rewards will keep growing and your benefits will improve measurably.